Parenting with BPD

Parenting with BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder): Tips for Balancing Mental Health and Family Life

parenting with bipolar disorder

Being a parent is one of the most rewarding and challenging experiences in life. But what if you struggle with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)? This blog post looks at the unique challenges that come with parenting while managing mental health issues. Find out how to balance your own wellbeing with the needs of your family, as well as useful tips for calming yourself down during difficult moments and keeping your relationships strong.

Introduction to Borderline Personality Disorder

Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is a mental illness that can make it difficult to regulate emotions, control impulsive behaviors, and maintain healthy relationships. People with BPD often experience intense fear of abandonment, feel chronically empty or bored, engage in self-destructive behaviors, and have a history of unstable relationships.

While the symptoms of BPD can be complex and difficult to manage, there are treatments available that can help people with BPD live healthier, happier lives. If you are parenting with BPD, there are some things you can do to help balance your mental health and your family life:

1. Seek professional help: If you’re struggling to manage your symptoms, it’s important to seek professional help. A therapist can provide you with the tools and support you need to better understand and cope with your BPD.

2. Be honest with your children: It’s okay to be honest with your children about your diagnosis. Let them know that you have a mental illness that sometimes makes it difficult to regulate your emotions. Reassure them that you are getting help and that they can always come to you if they have any questions or concerns.

3. Set boundaries: It’s important to set boundaries with your children regarding your illness. Explain what behaviors are acceptable and what is not acceptable. For example, you may need to set limits on how much time you spend talking about your BPD or discussing sensitive

Symptoms & Diagnosis of BPD

The symptoms of borderline personality disorder (BPD) can be divided into four main categories: emotional dysregulation, impulsivity, interpersonal difficulties, and distorted perceptions of self. 

Emotional dysregulation is characterized by intense and volatile emotions, which can often lead to self-harm or suicidal behaviors. Impulsivity can manifest as recklessness, substance abuse, binge eating, or risky sexual behaviors. Interpersonal difficulties may include chronic feelings of emptiness or loneliness, a fear of abandonment, and difficulty trusting others. Distorted perceptions of self can result in a constant feeling of inadequacy or worthlessness and may lead to dissociative behaviors.

Borderline personality disorder is typically diagnosed using the criteria laid out in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM). To be diagnosed with BPD, an individual must exhibit at least five of the nine diagnostic criteria laid out in the DSM. These criteria must include at least two of the following three symptom clusters: impulsive behavior, emotional instability, and disturbed interpersonal relationships.

Parenting Tips & Strategies for BPD

Many parents with borderline personality disorder (BPD) find it difficult to balance their mental health with their responsibilities to their children. It can be hard to cope with the symptoms of BPD while also trying to be a good parent. However, there are some things you can do to help make parenting with BPD easier.

Here are some tips and strategies for parenting with BPD:

1. Seek professional help: If you are struggling to cope with your BPD, it is important to seek professional help. There are many resources available that can help you manage your symptoms and learn how to better cope with your condition.

2. Be honest with your children: It is important to be honest with your children about your BPD. Explain what the disorder is and how it affects you. This will help them understand why you may act in certain ways or behave in certain ways.

3. Don’t take everything personally: One of the main symptoms of BPD is feeling overly sensitive to criticism or rejection. Try not to take everything your child says or does personally. This can be difficult, but it is important to remember that they are not deliberately trying to hurt you.

4. Set boundaries: It is important to set boundaries with your children when you have BPD. Let them know what behavior is acceptable and what is not acceptable. This will help them feel safe and secure and will prevent them from taking advantage of you emotionally.

Managing Stress and Emotions with BPD

It’s no secret that parenting can be a stressful experience, even under the best of circumstances. But if you’re also dealing with borderline personality disorder (BPD), the challenges can feel insurmountable.

The good news is that there are things you can do to manage your stress and emotions, and create a more stable environment for your family. Here are some tips:

1. Find a support system: It’s important to have people in your life who understand what you’re going through and can offer emotional support. This could be a therapist, doctor, friend, or family member. If you don’t have anyone in your life who meets this criteria, there are online support groups for parents with BPD.

2. Create structure: A consistent routine can help reduce stress and provide a sense of stability for both you and your child. Having set mealtimes, bedtimes, and scheduled activities can help minimize last-minute changes and spontaneity, which can be triggers for people with BPD.

3. Learn to identify your triggers: Everyone has different triggers for their BPD symptoms. It’s important to be aware of what sets off your symptoms so you can avoid or prepare for those situations.

4. Practice self-care: Taking care of yourself is essential when you’re managing any chronic condition, including BPD. Make sure to schedule time for activities that make you feel good – whether it’s exercise, reading, listening to music

Setting Boundaries and Maintaining Connections with Your Child

It can be difficult to set boundaries with your child when you have borderline personality disorder (BPD), but it is important to do so in order to maintain a healthy relationship. Here are some tips for setting boundaries and maintaining connections with your child:

1. Explain your condition to your child.

This will help them understand why you sometimes act in certain ways or why you may need to take medication.

2. Be consistent with your rules and expectations.

It is important to be consistent in your parenting, even if it is difficult at times. This will help your child feel safe and secure.

3. Seek professional help if needed.

If you feel like you are struggling to parent effectively, seek professional help from a therapist or counselor who specializes in BPD. This can be an invaluable resource for both you and your child.

4. Make time for connection.

Make sure to schedule regular time for just you and your child, whether it’s reading together, going for walks, or watching their favorite movie. This quality time will help maintain a strong bond between the two of you.

Coping Mechanisms and Self Care while Parenting with BPD

It is important to have a solid support system in place when parenting with borderline personality disorder (BPD). Friends, family, and mental health professionals can all be part of your support system. Additionally, self-care and coping mechanisms are crucial for managing BPD.

There are a few key things to keep in mind when it comes to self-care and coping mechanisms:

1. Make time for yourself: It is important to schedule time for yourself every week. This can be used for anything from reading, taking a bath, going for a walk, or getting a massage. Just make sure you are doing something that you enjoy and that relaxes you.

2. Find healthy outlets for stress: It is important to find healthy outlets for the stress that comes with parenting. Some healthy outlet ideas include exercise, journaling, and deep breathing exercises.

3. Seek professional help: Don’t be afraid to seek professional help if you feel like you are struggling to cope with your BPD. A therapist can help you develop healthy coping mechanisms and work through any challenges you are facing.

Resources for Parents Living with BPD

If you’re a parent living with borderline personality disorder (BPD), you know that managing your mental health can be a challenges. Here are some resources that may help you balance your mental health and family life:

-Support groups for parents living with BPD: There are many online and in-person support groups available for parents living with BPD. These groups can provide much-needed support, understanding, and advice from others who are going through similar experiences.

-Therapy: Individual therapy can provide valuable support for parents living with BPD. A therapist can help you manage your symptoms, work through difficult emotions, and develop healthy coping mechanisms.

-Medication: If you’re struggling with severe symptoms of BPD, medication may be an option to consider. Medication can help stabilize mood swings, reduce impulsivity, and improve emotional regulation.

-Self-care: Self-care is essential for parents living with BPD. Make sure to schedule time for yourself each day to do things that make you happy and help you relax. This could include exercise, reading, taking a bath, or spending time outdoors


Parenting with borderline personality disorder can be a difficult challenge for many parents. However, by understanding the condition and how it affects parenting decisions, you can develop strategies to balance your mental health and family life. From reaching out for professional help to implementing healthy communication techniques within your home, there are many ways that you can ensure that both yourself and your children’s needs are taken into account as you continue on this journey together.

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