My children shout, yell and talk back to me. What should I do to address this issue as a parent?
Example of Rude Behavior by the Children
Parents complain about the rude behavior of their children. A mother of teen children asked this question with a serious concern. She said, “I am a well-educated person with a respect in society. But my children do not listen to me or respect what I ask them to.
The following could be the reasons for this behavior of yelling, shouting, rude behavior and talking back.
Establishing their identity
Children are establishing their identity and they do not want someone to instruct, order or impose anything on them. They resist any such act aggressively.
Solutions to Address Shouting, Yelling and Backtalk of your Kids
1. Don’t impose anything on them
Instead, ask their opinions, discuss in a respectful and friendly way, explain well and create solutions with them in a participatory approach. Surely, it will make the difference.
Discipline strategies for parents and children
2. Catch them doing good and appreciate them
Appreciation encourages children and provokes them to keep doing good as expected to win good recognition. This continuous appreciation reminds them of what’s expected from them and what’s the reward. On the other hand, criticism lowers their self-esteem and demotivates them from doing good.
3. Involve your children in decision making
Involve them in simple decision-making matters and ask their opinions. It will remove their apprehension of not being heard. Thus, they will calm down and abstain from behaving rudely with you. The rude behavior of children is their struggle for recognition, involving them in decision-making is recognition.
4. Explain things Instead of imposing
When you continuously explain to children instead of bluntly or harshly stopping them from something, it enables them to understand why something is good or bad. It is a long-term personality development strategy that helps them even when they will grow as adults. It will stop the rude behavior of your children because of addressing the underlying issues.
5. Don’t indulge in a power tussle with your children.
Try to understand the root cause of the rude behavior of your child. Instead of indulging in gaining control over children or power tussle, parents learn to create a cooperative and participatory approach with their children. Inspire them for doing good things rather than wish for controlling them.
6. Don’t overreact and stay composed
Never overreact to the rude behavior of your child or yelling. When you overreact or lose your temperament you lose self-control and ultimately you lose control over the consequences. This leads to bad relationships with your child and a chain of unpleasant events.
7. Spend some time regularly with your children in an outdoor relaxed and tension-free environment.
Spending time outdoors provides an opportunity to open up and improve relationships with your children.